Why I Write...

So I've been trying to decide whether this blog should be a multi-purpose blog or one with a very narrow focus; as one friend and blogger of mine pointed out, it's not strictly necessary that a blog have a specific topic it explores consistently. That said, I'm not sure I want this to be an all-over-the-place type of blog, so while I'm sure I will bring in other hobbies or passions that I have throughout the course of writing, I think my primary focus will be on stepparenting. I know that there are tons of blogs out there--many of them very, very good--that deal with stepparenting (some of my favourites are http://www.amourfati.blogspot.com/ and stepinthetrenches.blogspot.com), and so there is a rich blogging history that I'm following by doing this.

But I think I bring something unique to the table. Well, maybe not unique unique, because I'm sure this situation exists beyond my own family unit, but it's certainly a less commonly discussed scenario in the stepparenting blog-world. In my own limited experience as a stepmom-blog reader, blogs are often a space for venting anonymously and for showcasing how difficult it can be to become a part of a blended or pre-existing family structure. And I think that it's great that the world gets to see how difficult it can be to walk into parenting when a child already has 2 (or more) parents. As I mentioned in my last post, my stepfamily world is generally harmonious. We all get along just fine, and though we may not all agree about every single parenting issue, those disputes are usually handled peacefully and calmly. I am so, so aware that I'm lucky, and that not every will-be stepmom walks into this kind of setup, but it's my lived experience, and I'm so grateful to my partner and to his ex-wife for bringing my stepdaughter into the world, and I'm honoured that I get to be a part of this parenting adventure. Beyond luck, though, I think we have characteristics and make decisions that lend themselves to peaceful and supportive co-parenting, and that's what I'd ultimately like to offer: a virtual picture of a stepfamily that works.

Out of curiosity, whether you're a stepmom or not, I'd love to hear from you. What is your vision of the roles and responsibilities of a stepmother? How does a stepmother parent a child, and what are the boundaries in terms of acceptable and unacceptable involvement from a stepmom? Leave your ideas in the comments section, and I'll incorporate them into a later post!